Dearest friends, I have finally entered the 21st century and discovered the world of blogs. So this is what has been going down in the city of Lumières-Lyon
First week
Well, things started out well when we left home late and I got to customs and they decided to touch me up because my 2kg B3s were too heavy to put in the hand luggage so had to be worn on my feet on the flight. Apparently boots that big need to go through the X-ray machines, and female staff have to touch every inch of your breast to make sure you are bomb free.
After acknowledging that I was not in fact going to blow up the plane, they decided to send me to the wrong gate, so 20 minutes before take-off, I had to run 32 gates away-being the other side of south terminal, with rigid boots, a now undone bra strap, a ski jacket and a bag full of heavy miscellaneous items crashing against my laptop; the wireless hasn’t worked since....
Also, quickdraws are not allowed in hand luggage....
There was a milk strike, but this didn’t bother me as I don’t particularly like milk.
We had to sign a billion forms to get into our accommodation with no oven, 2 hobs, a washroom the size of my wardrobe...I swear filling out forms is a national sport here, they must have hands of steel! No wonder they needed so much help in the war too busy filling out bloody forms:
First week
Well, things started out well when we left home late and I got to customs and they decided to touch me up because my 2kg B3s were too heavy to put in the hand luggage so had to be worn on my feet on the flight. Apparently boots that big need to go through the X-ray machines, and female staff have to touch every inch of your breast to make sure you are bomb free.
After acknowledging that I was not in fact going to blow up the plane, they decided to send me to the wrong gate, so 20 minutes before take-off, I had to run 32 gates away-being the other side of south terminal, with rigid boots, a now undone bra strap, a ski jacket and a bag full of heavy miscellaneous items crashing against my laptop; the wireless hasn’t worked since....
Also, quickdraws are not allowed in hand luggage....
There was a milk strike, but this didn’t bother me as I don’t particularly like milk.
We had to sign a billion forms to get into our accommodation with no oven, 2 hobs, a washroom the size of my wardrobe...I swear filling out forms is a national sport here, they must have hands of steel! No wonder they needed so much help in the war too busy filling out bloody forms:
Sergeant pierre: Hello Sergeant Jones, its world war 2 and we were just wondering if you could help us out with a bit of German bashing.
Sergeant Jones: indeed, but why were you not prepared for this?
Sergeant pierre: well, we had so many forms to sign, Hitler invaded and we had to sign a form, he had to sign it, his x-mother in law’s friend had to give a photocopy of her passport, birth certificate a urine sample and get her leg amputated before SHE could sign it....
We realised we didn’t have internet for another 2 weeks, and were not impressed as had to choose our course units via it, and set up a bank account using it, and sorting out housing benefits....
Second week
My first major linguistical error: I was in Decathlon and wanted to try on some shorts but couldn’t remember (or didn’t know in the first place) the word for “changing room” or “try on” so I said the next best thing (without thinking) to the man: “puis-je utiliser le chambre” which roughly translates to “can I use your bedroom”. He said something (which I didn’t understand) and I just laughed. He probably said something along the lines of “stupid English girl thinks she can chat me up at work...”. well, whatever he said, I just agreed with him!
We went to a sweat fest of a night club, and came out dripping wet and then got splashed by some half naked guy splashing around in a Lyonnais cultural monument/pond. So I was ill for the next few days.
I was told I wouldn’t be able to do Mont Blanc by somebody from the city club-this did not amuse me.
Public transport went on strike for a day but wasn’t bothered as I didn’t need to use it that day.
We went to the amphitheatre and climbed on it. Apparently climbing on a historical and cultural monument of Lyonnais culture is not allowed...I later found out it was also a UNESCO world heritage site....
Week 3
· We have internet!!!
· We went to the musée des beaux arts and molested some roman-esque statues.
· We went to the club called the loft which is pretty awesome! In fact amazing!
· Courses started and classes are difficult
Climbing classes started and the teacher didn’t seem to like me too much. There wasn’t much climbing as they told us how to belay etc...I gave a guy my number and asked him to call me if he went climbing anywhere. He couldn’t quite understand how I wanted to climb in winter, but I was trying to explain to him how England is rarely dry and warm, and if you drive 200miles, you wana climb! My climbing vocab is broadening, my climbing not so much
Public transport had a major strike for “social reasons”, next to nothing was working. Yes, third week, third strike. This DID piss me off as uni is an hour away via 2 forms of transport, but now was 1.5-2 hours with 4 bits of transport.
I went home to collect the many of things I’d left at home (because I decided that my climbing gear was more important than my French dictionary...) and shoved my way onto the last strike tram of the day. In fact, I didn’t need to shove, the French shoved me enough that they just carried me on. Everyone is best friends at the tram station, but when the tram doors open, it’s every man for himself!
On my return from the UK, I was again stopped at customs (I must just have a suspicious face!) and they completely emptied my hand luggage and tested it for what I can only assume was explosive substances. That, or they thought I was the kind of age to be trafficking cannabis, and were testing for drugs. Wonder what it will be next time....
Week 4
Climbing class was better this week. My teacher made me climb up a wall with no hands, he’s really pushing the technique. Apparently I have “good balance of weight” or some such, I can’t remember what he said. And he said “super” when I did some 5+ and a 6a. Though I think he grades them a little too easily as I found the 6a quite pleasant, which is unlike me!
Sergeant Jones: indeed, but why were you not prepared for this?
Sergeant pierre: well, we had so many forms to sign, Hitler invaded and we had to sign a form, he had to sign it, his x-mother in law’s friend had to give a photocopy of her passport, birth certificate a urine sample and get her leg amputated before SHE could sign it....
We realised we didn’t have internet for another 2 weeks, and were not impressed as had to choose our course units via it, and set up a bank account using it, and sorting out housing benefits....
Second week
My first major linguistical error: I was in Decathlon and wanted to try on some shorts but couldn’t remember (or didn’t know in the first place) the word for “changing room” or “try on” so I said the next best thing (without thinking) to the man: “puis-je utiliser le chambre” which roughly translates to “can I use your bedroom”. He said something (which I didn’t understand) and I just laughed. He probably said something along the lines of “stupid English girl thinks she can chat me up at work...”. well, whatever he said, I just agreed with him!
We went to a sweat fest of a night club, and came out dripping wet and then got splashed by some half naked guy splashing around in a Lyonnais cultural monument/pond. So I was ill for the next few days.
I was told I wouldn’t be able to do Mont Blanc by somebody from the city club-this did not amuse me.
Public transport went on strike for a day but wasn’t bothered as I didn’t need to use it that day.
We went to the amphitheatre and climbed on it. Apparently climbing on a historical and cultural monument of Lyonnais culture is not allowed...I later found out it was also a UNESCO world heritage site....
Week 3
· We have internet!!!
· We went to the musée des beaux arts and molested some roman-esque statues.
· We went to the club called the loft which is pretty awesome! In fact amazing!
· Courses started and classes are difficult
Climbing classes started and the teacher didn’t seem to like me too much. There wasn’t much climbing as they told us how to belay etc...I gave a guy my number and asked him to call me if he went climbing anywhere. He couldn’t quite understand how I wanted to climb in winter, but I was trying to explain to him how England is rarely dry and warm, and if you drive 200miles, you wana climb! My climbing vocab is broadening, my climbing not so much
Public transport had a major strike for “social reasons”, next to nothing was working. Yes, third week, third strike. This DID piss me off as uni is an hour away via 2 forms of transport, but now was 1.5-2 hours with 4 bits of transport.
I went home to collect the many of things I’d left at home (because I decided that my climbing gear was more important than my French dictionary...) and shoved my way onto the last strike tram of the day. In fact, I didn’t need to shove, the French shoved me enough that they just carried me on. Everyone is best friends at the tram station, but when the tram doors open, it’s every man for himself!
On my return from the UK, I was again stopped at customs (I must just have a suspicious face!) and they completely emptied my hand luggage and tested it for what I can only assume was explosive substances. That, or they thought I was the kind of age to be trafficking cannabis, and were testing for drugs. Wonder what it will be next time....
Week 4
Climbing class was better this week. My teacher made me climb up a wall with no hands, he’s really pushing the technique. Apparently I have “good balance of weight” or some such, I can’t remember what he said. And he said “super” when I did some 5+ and a 6a. Though I think he grades them a little too easily as I found the 6a quite pleasant, which is unlike me!
I can subscribe to trips on Monday which I’m very excited about, though (as is usual with France) you have to get insurance from the national mountaineering and climbing federation (ffme) and get a medical certificate to join. And I have classes at that time
Week 5
I still haven’t got my courses sorted, I only have 15 credits when I should have 30...I’m not going to enjoy the rest of this week L; I have to get my form signed by Wednesday. Extremely mauvais temps! I have to adhere to this climbing excursion, get a medical certificate, get (yet more) forms signed, get my Erasmus form stamped and send that home.
Additional facts
The public transport is actually very good when it works, there are 2 funiculars (which I can now spell!), 4 metros, 4 trams, buses and a few electric bus lines.
National sports here include:
· Watching people run for the tram and guessing if they’ll make it or not
· Xenophobia and staring at foreign people
· Signing forms
· Charging extortionate amounts for cheese
· Being miserable
· Having ridiculous opening hours (eg EVERYTHING is open 9-12, 2-4. But banks are closed on a Monday, and open later on a Thursday, but close earlier on a Friday! Things close earlier on a Wednesday...24h doesn’t exist here!)
· Carrying baguette visibly in your bag
· Snogging on the streets.
· Being impatient
· STRIKES!!!! And protesting
Things Lyonnais frown upon:
· Foreign people
· Skirts above knee length
· Smiling
Good things the Lyonnais do:
· Give an old lady a seat on buses
· Press the “open door” button if somebody is running for (and nearly at) the tram
location
I live on top of a hill and the city is in a valley with 2 rivers. There is a really lovely church at Fourviere no more than 3 miles from me and you can see Mont Blanc from it on a clear day.
Today
went for a jog, went to take part in an anti TCL (transport for lyon) strike, saw some lego men and giant pringle pots then went to the musée du cinéma.
Missing you loads!!! Also, my proffesional opinion is your one amazing writer :) i read it all intently keep it up! :)
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Crys - as you know supposed to be climbing in wales this week but a VERY bad bout of tonsilitis has meant I cant even get out of bed. Reading your blog cheered me up :-) i know youve found it a bit hard but seems like youre having a better time now. keep up the writing! laura x
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